Toughen Up, Buttercup

I have ignored this blog for too long and I am sorry I have not documented so many things. It's been about two years and YES! I survived grad school and now have a beautiful diploma on my wall to remind me that I can do anything I want to do. However, the last lap of the graduate race taught me what I think is the greatest lesson of grad school (and probably life).

In order to graduate I had to pass a comprehensive exam that tests everything you've learned in all your classes. Not one class, but all of them. So, I took the mega test, passed it and anxiously awaited for my results. One week passed and the suspense was killing me so I emailed my professor.

I asked if my scores would be posted online soon. No response.

I wrote back and said, "You're killing me. Did I pass?" His response was classic.

I was slightly offended at first but he couldn't have been more right about me. Two years and great grades I was still insecure about my scores, my work, myself. TOUGHEN UP was right.  You've got to have a thick skin in this life especially if you want to make a difference and lead others in this world. I thanked him later.

My husband and I have started a new business venture that require us to feel our way through the darkness, motivate others when we are exhausted, persevere when others say the project tis too big, save every penny we make and push through on minimal sleep. There are days I find my thoughts wandering into the realm of settling. Settling for comfort and our current lifestyle. But thats never been me. Our new project (which I promise to write about soon) has amazing potential and I believe can make a difference in many peoples' lives and leave a legacy for my future children. 

That email stays with me to this day. Those words help to pick me up when I start to feel defeated. Toughen up, buttercup. XOXO

YOLO, right?

Today was an everything and nothing day. Thoughts about everything I have to accomplish, pay, clean, email, call, feed, print, send, worry about, be happy about, train for, the past, the future. You name it, I thought about it. But I could not arrive at any real conclusion or resolution. Then, YOLO popped in my head.

You only live once as far as I know. So does that mean I should throw caution to the wind and dive in to whatever catches my eye? Or should I obsess over success and take everything seriously? I am definitely much better at the latter. How do I put order to the madness in my head??

So, I did what I usually do when I need to find peace and motivation. I turned the world off and went for a run. A hard 30 min run was all I needed today. Want to know the outcome? A beautiful to-do list! I prioritized and took care of what  could take care of today.

1) Priority for 2013: create and develop a brand
2) Create and implement marketing strategy and calendar
3) Register DBA and logo
4) Apply for merchant services
5) Choose and upload future website photos
6) Follow #2 religiously
7) Revert to long term to do list weekly.

And since my evening clients are on vacation, I got it all done!

I also found the direction I have been searching for since the first day of grad school. I'm taking my business goals all the way, working hard and enjoying the ride. Balance is healthy and extremes have never worked for me. 

You can live your life carelessly. You can live your life stressing about what may or may not happen. You can take care of what you can take care of today and have faith that you'll get to where you're supposed to be if you try your best. I guess YOLO is about doing what makes you happy, but most importantly enjoying the ride.

YOLO. Its what the kids are saying these days.

My partner in crime, I mean life, and me. A sneak peak of our fitness photo shoot last October.

It has been a year and so much has happened.

  My last post was more than a year ago. Last you heard from me I was prepping for my wedding, trying to figure out how to motivate my clients, as well as searching for the path I want to take after graduation. I think it is only fair that I update you on each of these.

  Well, I am married now (Woooohooo!). It was surprisingly the most perfect day ever and it turns out that this whole marriage thing feels very natural and easy. Being the pessimist that I am, I tend to expect the worst. However, I was able to get a good night's sleep the night before the wedding, I was very happy with my weight and body fat percentage (I trained hard!), loved my hair and make up, the ceremony started on time, I make it through the ceremony without crying (there has to be some sort of award for that) and the entire evening was filled with nothing but love from every single one of our guests. Amazing.

  Motivating my clients is still a work in progress as everyone is different but I feel I have made improvements. The first change I made was to take the mystery out of teaching exercises. I simply ask my clients how they learn best. "Do you learn better by listening, doing, or do you prefer to see demonstrations?" Most people choose two options. Yes, it sounds like common sense to ask someone that, but I am a stickler for perfect form and was often indecisive about how to approach teaching movements like the squat and deadlift. These are complicated movements if you want to get the most out of them. 

  Second, I removed the sugar coating and started being completely honest regarding food and training habits. I used to gradually transition people out of bad habits and gradually increase training frequency but it didn't always work. So, being that I am probably the only person that will tell them that they've got to cut out alcohol completely versus cut down to one night a week, I decided to disregard hurt feelings and expect them to just do it or warn them they wont see much of a change. "Stop eating out, cook at home and stop drinking". 

  These small changes have made my life easier and made a difference in the way my clients view me. 

  Regarding the graduate school monster, I am due to graduate in December! I delayed my graduation a semester in exchange for a family vacation. We toured Europe for 15 days and I definitely got the mental get-away I needed. 

  While I still constantly think about the direction I want to take my career, I always come back to one thing-owning my own facility. For the past month I have been editing a draft of a business plan I wrote a year ago! I have also begun my search for grant money and start up business capital. Just the thought of working for someone else's vision, goals and being told where I have to be and how long to be there makes me feel like a caged bird. I believe in myself as a trainer and a fitness professional, so why not? Freedom definitely seems worth the sacrifice it will take to succeed in this endeavor. Updates on the facility coming soon with hopes to win your feedback!

A possible solution: Communication=Motivation

Motivation depends on CLEAR objectives, right? If I can ALIGN my objectives to an individuals personal drive, using the most effective communication possible then the power of motivation shall be unleashed! Yes?! However, I haven't exactly been sitting at the library researching motivation. I stumbled across something better. Something a little less traditional but so far, very effective at helping me understand people, how they learn and what motivates them. I am learning communication styles and how they learn based on body language, visual clues, and vocabulary.

My best friend is a licensed NLP (neural language programmer) and Life & Career Coach. She is teaching me about my personal communication style, what motivates me and then about others. Once I learn how to read others' learning and communication style, I can change my language and my strategies to suit theirs. She is a genius! And let's not forget I have to have a goal-apply these skills to a client categorized as obese by June 23 (my 29th Birthday).

The results of my communication style: I am auditory and auditory digital. That means I talk to myself often and am easily distracted by noise. I learn by listening, enjoy music and prefer talking on the phone rather than texting. You may notice I breathe mostly through my belly and may move my eyes sideways when conversing. I memorize by utilizing steps, procedures, and sequences. I like to be TOLD how I'm doing and I can be sensitive to someone's TONE of voice or certain word choices. I want to know that if something "makes sense" to you. <---Useful info right?!

Next step is to gather specific information about my clients.  Once I learn how they learn, I can use their language to optimize my communication about their goals. I can also apply this new knowledge during training sessions and conversations and tailor meal plans and emails to a format that grabs their attention. Does this make sense? ;-) Yay!! I see a light at the end of the tunnel of confusing communication!

My Workout this morning:

1 mile run

Dumbbell push jerks 3-3-3-3
3 Rounds
30 Over head walking lunges (25lbs)
15 box jumps
30 V-ups

Thorough stretch ( hamstrings, glutes, QL, lats, biceps, triceps) and 50 back extensions.

Motivation: Yesterday you said tomorrow.

OK so my last post was me sort of venting. On a rant (Thank you for listening!!). But I have not stopped thinking about the subject matter. It genuinely makes me angry, as an exercise physiology major, a trainer, a CrossFitter, a woman. Its makes me angry to see this nation so fat, so uneducated, so unmotivated. Do overweight people not get tired of feeling awful? Do parents with overweight children not see what is happening to them? How can people just SIT all day? How can people eat so terribly and be OK with it? How can Americans feed Americans TOXIC foods? Then it dawned on me...as unaware and uneducated as "they are", so am I.

The psychology of nutrition and obesity are fields I have never had to cross. I have no idea why it is so hard be motivated to exercise or eat well. I tend to be intrinsically motivated so it comes natural to me to just do these things. If I am unhappy about something, I just act and expect others to do the same. In fact, if I go more than 2 days with out exercise I find myself moody, angry, terribly frustrated,  and feeling guilty. My heart craves to work and my muscles look different...softer. So I travel as fast as I can to the nearest gym or I make my own workout using whatever space is available to me. And I proceed to enjoy moving, sweating, breathing hard and working to accomplish the initial goal that I always set before I begin any workout. When I am done, I thank God for the ability to do all the things I just did because at any moment it could be taken away from me. Why doesn't everyone enjoy using the amazing body they were given?

I think part of my journey to figuring out what I am going to do with this degree, with my life includes learning about motivation. Particularly those with eating disorders and/or who require external motivation.  My career may depend on it, and if I do a really good job educating myself, I could help many many people. Don't get me wrong-I don't intend on sugar coating or petting people through any workout or consultation but I will have more carefully planned strategies.

If anyone reading this is overweight and has tried to lose weight multiple time with no success I would love to hear from you. I would love to learn about your struggles and how a trainer could play a positive role for you. I'd love to interview you! In the meantime, back to the library I go to search for literature that can help me arrive at my own conclusions about this subject and what I can do to make a difference and improve my skills as a trainer with this population.

My email: progressiontraining@gmail.com

My Workout for the day: Coach Nadia at Soul KICKED MY A**

Weightlifting: Deadlift test day 1 RM: 205lbs (new PR!!)

WOD: 3 x 3 sets

2 Front Squat (95lbs)
10 KB swing (53lbs) <---new PR!!
1 rope climb
2 min rest

***I was too tired to look up at the clock but it was somewhere around around 23 min

Walking is not exercise.

Can someone please tell America that WALKING IS NOT EXERCISE. Walking is simply moving your body. For some populations (i.e, morbidly obese that can not leave their home anymore or the terribly crippled) walking can elevate the heart rate but for the most part WALKING = MOVING IN A NATURAL FASHION. The body was made to walk all day and not sit all day. Damn that felt good to say.

I talk to so many people that say things like, "Oh I did exercise today. I walked around the block with the dog when I got home." or "Yea Im working out now. I got on the treadmill and walked for 30 minutes at the gym today." Really? Think about that.

OK, OK so I'd say the #1 reason people don't exercise is HABIT. Exercising is not a habit so when they go about planning their day, their week, weekends, fitting in a workout doesn't even occur to them. Week after week, month after month, you get older, weaker, a little heavier, maybe wider, softer...you get where I'm going.

The #2 reason I would say people don't exercise is pure LAZINESS. People want to be comfortable. They want a pill that makes pain just disappear, pills that melt fat away. But how does that even sound realistic? If health is the greatest wealth (and it is) what makes anyone think that it would come so easily? A pill? Really?  I don't even think Jesus would agree with that.

HEALTH TAKES HARD WORK. Working out is hard. You will be uncomfortable. It will probably cross your mind to quit most of the time. Eating well takes some sacrifice, discipline and dedication. But doesn't that describe most of everything we do in life? So why cheat your on health? Ultimately, those that love you the most suffer from A LAZY PERSON'S MISTAKES. (That's if you're a lazy person, of course. If you are not lazy, please disregard that last statement.)

Everyone can benefit from exercise. Even if you have back problems, knee issues, cancer, scoliosis, arthritis, past surgeries, etc. YOU CAN AND SHOULD. If you need help in doing so, an EDUCATED TRAINER CAN HELP YOU. Next time you go for a 30 minute "walking workout" think about all the other things you could have been doing to keep your body functioning properly: push ups, sit ups, squats, dips. <---All you need for those are some space, a little time and maybe a chair/park bench.

And ladies, if you even think that you can't do a push up or any of the above mentioned calisthenics, remember: IF WE CAN GIVE BIRTH, WE CAN DO ANYTHING!!

My afternoon workout:

Box Squats: 5-5-5-5 (I just learned these so I didn't go heavy- 105lbs for me)

WOD (Thank you Soul for kicking my a** today)
12 min AMRAP- thruster ladder

1 Thruster (65lbs)
8 bar hopping burpees
24 Double unders

My score: 5 rounds + 4 thrusters

Wodapallooza 2012. I did it just because. Trained hard for 2 1/2 weeks. It was fantastic and this picture reminds of how physically solid I felt. And how close I came to quitting all the time - but I didn't. And I don't ever want to.